so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
