miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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