I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
