There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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