see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Randomize
