how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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