I accidentally burped into my bong.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
NoShamevember. You game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize