i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
40s are totally the cure
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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