what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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