Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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