Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize