his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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