I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
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