i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
