i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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