I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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