so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
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