dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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