I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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