just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
