you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize