I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize