marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
