don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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