I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
this will be a night to untag.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Randomize
