ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
