she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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