I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
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I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
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We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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