i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
