Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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