So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
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Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
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I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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