we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
it hurts more in the daytime
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
he shaved USA in his pubs
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.