Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral. http://tfl.nu/e026
  Replies (8) Good night (1951) Bad night (610)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time. http://tfl.nu/ka3h
  Replies (7) Good night (2713) Bad night (808)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night http://tfl.nu/ih63
  Replies (5) Good night (4700) Bad night (846)
• Favorite

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (980): after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape http://tfl.nu/d3c4
  Replies (8) Good night (3759) Bad night (933)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line. http://tfl.nu/zp2p
  Replies (15) Good night (1280) Bad night (4439)
• Favorite

  (957): View more from

  I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (957): I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day. http://tfl.nu/42ia
  Replies (9) Good night (5959) Bad night (1174)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car.. http://tfl.nu/jqo1
  Replies (5) Good night (774) Bad night (3105)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (469): Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened? http://tfl.nu/ksd8
  Replies (12) Good night (773) Bad night (1948)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (641): Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings. http://tfl.nu/iq9m
  Replies (4) Good night (1705) Bad night (802)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies. http://tfl.nu/sr2h
  Replies (17) Good night (2899) Bad night (717)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica http://tfl.nu/lleg
  Replies (2) Good night (2010) Bad night (577)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it http://tfl.nu/yi0x
  Replies (7) Good night (1313) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect. http://tfl.nu/ksxu
  Replies (2) Good night (457) Bad night (1099)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob

  (1-931): View more from Tennessee

  Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (931): He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob (1-931): Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic http://tfl.nu/rfmh
  Replies (4) Good night (1658) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life

  (562): View more from California

  Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life (562): Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares http://tfl.nu/ynew
  Replies (0) Good night (430) Bad night (318)

Randomize