Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
