in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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