FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
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