I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Randomize