look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
