tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
