I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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