Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
