I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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