Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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