Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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