oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Randomize