Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
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The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
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