He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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