I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I will be naked everywhere
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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