yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
