the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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