We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
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I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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